I Was the ‘Penis and Vagina’ Kid from the Classic 1990 Film: An Interview.

Arnold Schwarzenegger is best known as an action movie legend. But, in the midst of his blockbuster fame in the 1980s and 1990s, he also starred in several surprisingly great comedies. Chief among them is Kindergarten Cop, which celebrates its 35th anniversary this December.

The Film and An Iconic Moment

In the classic film, Schwarzenegger plays a tough police officer who goes undercover as a kindergarten teacher to locate a fugitive. Throughout the story, the procedural element functions as a basic structure for Arnold to share adorable moments with his young class. Without a doubt the standout involves a little boy named Joseph, who spontaneously stands up and informs the stoic star, “Males have a penis, girls have a vagina.” The Terminator replies icily, “Thank you for that information.”

That iconic child was brought to life by youth performer Miko Hughes. Beyond this role encompassed a notable part on Full House as the bully to the child stars and the pivotal role of the youngster who comes back in the film version of Stephen King’s Pet Sematary. Hughes remains active today, with a slate of movies in development. Additionally, he frequently attends fan conventions. He recently recalled his experiences from the set of Kindergarten Cop after all this time.

A Young Actor's Perspective

Q: To begin, how old were you when you filmed Kindergarten Cop?

Miko Hughes: My understanding is I was four. I was the youngest of all the kids on set.

That's remarkable, I can't remember being four. Do you retain any flashes from that time?

Yeah, to a degree. They're brief images. They're like picture memories.

Do you recall how you were cast in Kindergarten Cop?

My parents, primarily my mom would accompany me to auditions. Frequently it was an open call. There'd be a room full of young actors and we'd all simply wait around, enter the casting office, be in there for a very short time, read a small part they wanted and that's all. My parents would feed me the lines and then, when I became literate, that was some of the first material I was reading.

Do you have an impression of meeting Arnold? What was your take on him?

He was very kind. He was enjoyable. He was nice, which arguably stands to reason. It would have been odd if he was unpleasant to all the kids in the classroom, that surely wouldn't foster a positive atmosphere. He was fun to be around.

“It would have been odd if he was unpleasant to all the kids in the classroom.”

I knew he was a major movie star because I was told, but I had not actually watched his movies. I felt the importance — like, that's cool — but he didn't frighten me. He was simply playful and I was eager to interact with him when he had time. He was occupied, of course, but he'd occasionally joke around here and there, and we would dangle from his limbs. He'd show his strength and we'd be holding on. He was incredibly giving. He bought every kid in the classroom a Sony Walkman, which at the time was the hottest tech. This was the hottest tech out there, that funky old yellow cassette player. I used to rock out to the Power Rangers soundtrack and the Ninja Turtles soundtrack for years on that thing on that thing. It wore out in time. I also have a authentic coach's whistle. He had the coach whistle, and the kids all received one too as well.

Do you remember your days on set as being enjoyable?

You know, it's amusing, that movie was this cultural thing. It was a huge film, and it was a wonderful time, and you would think, in retrospect, I would want my memories to be of collaborating with Schwarzenegger, working with [director] Ivan Reitman, visiting Astoria, seeing the set, but my memories are of being a really picky eater at lunch. For instance, they got everyone pizza, but I wasn't a pizza fan. All I would eat was the pepperoni off the top. Then, the first-generation Game Boy was new. That was the hot thing, and I was quite skilled. I was the youngest and some of the older kids would ask for my help to pass certain levels on games because I could do it, and I was really proud of that. So, it's all childhood recollections.

The Line

OK, that specific dialogue, do you remember anything about it? Did you understand the words?

At the time, I likely didn't understand what the word shocking meant, but I realized it got a reaction and it caused the crew to chuckle. I was aware it was kind of something I wouldn't usually utter, but I was given an exception in this case because it was funny.

“My mom thought hard about it.”

How it originated, based on what I was told, was they hadn't finalized all the dialogue. A few scenes were established early on, but once they had the kids together, it wasn't necessarily improv, but they worked on it while filming and, reportedly it's either the director or producers came to my mom and said, "There's a concept. We want Miko to say this. Are you okay with this?" My mom didn't agree right away. She said, "I need to consider this, I need time" and took a short while. She deliberated carefully. She said she wasn't sure, but she felt it would likely become one of the most memorable lines from the movie and she was right.